Stop Taking Things So Seriously

This week's article comes from the comments a few blogs back.  Someone asked how do I stop taking things seriously yet stay on top of things on the job?  Hopefully this blog from Less Ordinary Living gives a few good ideas.

STOP TAKING LIFE SO SERIOUSLY

By Phil, February 25, 2010 6:22 pm Happiness, Inspiration 31 Comments

Reading time: 2 minutes and 47 seconds

Chillax

Click here to subscribe to Less Ordinary Living – 2 weekly doses of sanity and inspiration.  Help us reach our target of 500 subscribers (currently 209).  Thank you.
In pursuit of perfection
Have you ever felt like you are trying way too hard?  Are you stretching and straining every sinew striving for the happy life?  Waking at 5am to run 10 miles before an intense yoga session, then hitting the office and working flat out til 8pm.  Cooking that macrobiotic tofu stir fry, washed down with a superfood smoothie, before updating your seven blogs, tending your organic zen garden and finishing the reading for tomorrow’s philosophy class.
Things may not be quite that extreme, but trying to live life to the full all the time can be exhausting.  Perhaps even more importantly, it can also lack zing, spark, energy and just plain fun.
Fade to grey
I have had a fascinating time over the last few months working on improving myself.  I dedicated myself to a regime of meditation, have been training hard for a marathon and cutting back on my alcohol intake.  As a solopreneur with extrovert tendencies I was interested in exploring the concept of being self-sufficient and so spent a lot of time alone in my inner world.  Don’t get me wrong, this has all been great and I’ve learned a lot about myself.  Yet I woke up one morning and realised that somewhere along the way I’d lost myself.  I was trying way too hard.  I had shut down from the world around me and felt like a silent ghost fading into the background.  I’d forgotten to enjoy the journey and have fun.  Time to lighten up.
Back to Life
I took a deep breath and said b*ll*cks to it.  I started talking, laughing, bringing people into my life.  I started to be kinder to myself – if I’m tired I won’t run, if I’m not in the mood I won’t meditate just to tick a box, heck I might even enjoy a glass of wine or three on a school night.  All the pressure and stress I was feeling started to melt away.  It was like taking off a suit of armour.  Slowly but surely the smile has returned to my face.
The Middle Path
Once I stopped trying too hard, balance returned to my life.  I still have ambitions to live life to the full and am pursuing that.  Yet I remember that this means finding pleasure every day, not just chaining myself to a rock in Spartan self-denial.  Every day I’m looking for the middle path – doing something meaningful and enjoyable.
The best thing of all is that this change of attitude has had a big impact on the way the world responds to me.  It sounds clichéd, however when you smile the world smiles back.  Suddenly people are responding differently to me.  Before they stared straight through my ghostly apparition, now they are talking and engaging.  Things are flowing where before they were stuck.
So what have I learned from this?  Here are five simple yet important lessons:
1)   Life has a sense of humour – the world has an astounding way of playing with us.  If you take things too seriously this can be very stressful, if you play along and laugh about it life becomes delightful.  So lighten up and enjoy the joke, rather than being the joke.
2)   People matter – there is great power in exploring our inner-self, yet even monks live in monasteries.  People bring energy, creativity, joy and learning to life.  Surround yourself with great people and revel in it.
3)   Stress is a killer – taking life too seriously is extremely stressful.  All the expectation and pressure feels like wearing a heavy backpack.  Stress drains our energy, dampens our enthusiasm and makes us sick.  Lightening up takes the stress away and helps us live life.
4)   Let it go – there are some things in life that are fundamental and worth fighting for.  There are many more things that are trivial and we should let go.  Letting go of some of this weight brings more joy to life.
5)   Enjoy the journey – it is vital to have some long term vision and goals to motivate us.  Yet we need a balance with enjoying life each and every day to experience true enjoyment.  Life is precious, so enjoy it every day.
Wherever you are on your journey, I think these are valuable lessons to keep in mind.  If you find your face frozen in a grimace, if you can’t remember the last time you smiled (never mind laughed), if you feel like life is an endless hamster wheel, it might be time to ask if you are taking it all too seriously.  Please share your thoughts on these ideas with the world by leaving a comment – thank you!

Change

 

This week's article by Connie Podesta is linked here

 

Why accepting change is vital to your professional success

Like it or not, change is an integral part of today's business climate. Those employees who embrace and initiate change will thrive, while those who complain and fear change may be headed for the unemployment line. Employers feel strongly about the need to have employees who are successful change agents for their team and their organization as a whole. What exactly is a "change agent?" An agent is someone who represents the interests of another person or organization, and his or her job is to take care of business and make sure everything goes smoothly. Thus, a change agent helps take care of an employer's business by facilitating change.
Are you a change agent for your organization? Can others count on you to make sure things go smoothly? Do you continue to take care of business in the midst of change?
Although some employees have been conditioned to fear change, we must not lose sight of the fact that change is normal, and most of us will experience unpredictable changes in both our personal and professional lives. In the workplace, changes can occur as a result of new thinking, advances in technology, innovation and progress, knowledge and communication, as well as mergers, takeovers, layoffs, and downsizing. These organizational changes can directly affect our professional lives as well as our personal lives. They may also lead to feelings of sadness, frustration, grief, and anger, especially when jobs are lost or worse, when an entire organization ceases to exist. So let's discuss how we can make this normal life experience-change-as positive and beneficial as possible.
What's Wrong with Change?
Employers want commitment to change when it's necessary. Knowing that, then, why are so many people resistant to it? The number one reason is fear, although very few people are willing to admit it. None of us want to acknowledge that we doubt our ability to integrate new ideas, use new technology, or adapt to new organizations. We don't even want to think about what's ahead: new management, new ways of doing things, new terminology, new titles, and new job description.
Fear can have several components:
1. Fear of the unknown: What will happen to my organization, my job, my life, as I know it now? How secure is my future?
2. Fear of not being in control: What should I do? Should I just wait around while they make decisions that could seriously affect my life?
3. Fear of being inadequate: I know how to do this job now, but will I be able to do it as well as they expect me to when everything has changed? And if I can't, what happens then?
4. Fear of moving outside your personal comfort zone: I've been doing my job this way for years, and I'm very good at it. Why do we have to change what has worked so well for so long?
No matter which category your fear falls in, one thing is for sure. The more we fight and resist the change, the more painful and frightening the changes will be. Resisting doesn't keep a new idea from taking hold; it simply makes the process longer and more painful. Change will happen no matter what. We will handle it better when we learn to move with the change-not against it. Plus, this is definitely not the time to drag your feet because managers are not inclined to take employees by the hand and lead them through the change process.
Communication is Key
There is no doubt that employees often view change from a different perspective than their supervisors. Many employees believe that management doesn't understand their side of the story, and managers often feel it is the employees who don't understand why the change is necessary. This is why communication is so vital during any change circumstance.
It's been said that lack of communication is the number one reason why personal relationships can develop problems, and the same holds true for relationships between employers and employees. Change will require open communication on both sides. Unfortunately, fear has the power to freeze employees in their tracks and prevent them from expressing their ideas and opinions.
When faced with change we must always ask ourselves this important question: Does my resistance to change have anything to do with my own fears? That's a tough question and one that's not easy to answer honestly. It's natural to fear the unknown and lack of control. We know that we won't be quite as proficient at our tasks while we're in the process of learning to do things a new way. We know we will have to work a lot harder. Are we willing to let go of the present to embrace the future? We may not know what the future will bring, but we are responsible for what we bring to the future.
The Positive Side of Change
If you routinely describe your current job as boring, mundane, or menial, then perhaps a change is good for you. One of the most positive aspects of change is that it is never boring. On the contrary, it can create passion. And passion-and the excitement, creativity, and energy that accompany it-is the spark that keeps us going.
Passion could be called the charge for our life's batteries. Without that charge, it's hard to get our engines revved up. That igniting charge is sparked by the challenge of change-learning new things, meeting new people, growing as professionals, and taking risks that push us to reach our potential. None of that can happen unless and until we are willing to experience the fear that inevitably arises when we move out of our comfort zones. No risk, no fear; no fear, no passion; no passion, no fun.
If we want passion back in our lives, we must be willing to meet the challenge of change. What might that mean for you? Perhaps it might involve going back to school, learning how to work with a computer, working with a team, taking on new responsibilities, or redefining a career path. If you want to remain employable, you may have to change more than just your attitude and your reaction to change. You may have to change some of your ideas and goals to create a better future for yourself.
Embrace Upcoming Changes
Many people are content to live their lives by playing it safe. If fear, pain, and hard work are prerequisites of change, it's easier to understand why some people are so dedicated to resisting it. They might be good at giving all the best-sounding reasons why this particular change is not right for the department, the organization, the team, or the customer. However, their underlying concern may be their fear about how the change will affect them-their job-their lives.
If you've been reacting negatively to change, it's important to modify your attitude and your behavior before it's too late. Think about what you really want. Comfort at all costs? The status quo? The good old days? If those are the aspects you desire-if that's what you're waiting for-then you will probably soon be out of a job. If, instead, you want challenge and welcome change, you will always be employable.

Written by Connie Podesta

Diminishing Fear

This week's article topic was recommmended by a coworker.  For me it seems to boil down to trust and communication. 

Diminishing Fear in the Workplace

Today, it seems that we are living in a world filled with uncertainty. Change is

constant, and predictions  of doom and  gloom prevail. Confusion  or uncertainty

about the future can lead to feelings of anxiety and fear both in our lives  and

on the job.  How can we  manage fear? Does  it transfer to  the workplace? Is it

reflective of a culture gone sour? Should leaders pay attention to fear?

According to psychologists, there is no such thing as “healthy” fear. Fear robs people of their potential and is a barrier to individual and organizational performance. Fear-based outcomes are usually negative and in most cases affect both organizational and individual quality of life.

Managing fear in the workplace is important and leaders can influence the level of fear in their departments or organizations through effective management techniques.

How can we recognize fear in the workplace?

Is your workplace highly competitive?

In a highly competitive work environment fear is easy to see. Competition between employees or departments creates anxiety, destroying trust and setting off a chain reaction of negative behaviours that can have a negative effect on the total culture of the organization. In a highly competitive organizational culture, people tend to focus on eliminating threats instead of working to achieve desired outcomes and they are more likely to avoid reprisal, perhaps at the expense of others.

Is short-term thinking the standard mode of operation in your department or organization?

Short-term thinking is usually apparent when there is a high degree of emphasis on monthly or quarterly results. Everyone is so focused on delivering the short term goal that there is no time left for long range planning. Eventually, people lose their sense of higher purpose and management fails to provide resources for long range needs. The focus on short-term profitability robs their efforts to develop a plan to become competitive, to stay in business and to provide jobs.

Oftentimes, employees juggle data to avoid repercussion from management and so the numbers do not tell the full story. According to quality consultant, William Scherkenbach, "With a combination of fear and ignorance people can virtually bring any process into statistical control."

Quality guru, Edward Deming refers to eliminating fear as one of his 14 principles of quality management. Deming’s methods helped Japan to move from a world perception as a producer of cheap, shoddy imitations post World War II to one of producing innovative quality products.

He said, “Encourage effective two way communication and other means to drive out fear throughout the organization so that everybody may work effectively and more productively for the company.” Therefore eliminating fear is essential to initiating and sustaining a total quality effort, pursuing continuous improvement, encouraging innovation and achieving customer delight. Deming suggests that standards prescribing quotas or numerical goals for people in management should be replaced with aids and helpful leadership to achieve continual improvement of quality and productivity.

How can we manage fear?

Individually, the most important way to manage fear is to acknowledge that it exists. As well, it is important to manage fear by:

1.            Establishing clear expectations—being clear on what your peers or staff expect of you.

2.            Assessing fear—that is, identifying what you or your team is fearful of and how it affects good performance.

3.            Clarifying perceptions—do you feel that people on the job have to do things that are against their better judgement?

4.            Defining the level of trust—do you feel that your peers, staff or suppliers are trustworthy? Do they trust you?

5.            Communication—do you feel that your staff members have all the information needed to carry out their jobs? Is feedback being collected among peers, employees and management?

6.            Training—is individual development and advancement supported by management? Are you, your peers and staff fully qualified for their jobs? If not, what have you done to ensure that your peers or staff acquire new knowledge and develop new skills?

An environment which helps people cope with fear must include leadership, trust and vision:

Leadership

The job of a leader in managing fear is to create an environment where employees can share information without concern for repercussions. Find out what generates fear in the organization. Listen and observe for signs of fear and take the lead on speaking up about fear. When people do speak up, a leader who manages fear effectively will be patient and understanding. The leader will listen, paraphrase and collect data before passing judgement on employees’ suggestions and actions.

Leaders must also respond to employees’ concerns and ideas quickly. Lack of response sends the message that nothing here will change. As well, leaders must reward cooperation and innovation and reward efforts as well as outcomes.